The Love Language of RV Parking

It’s “People Watching” for the camping set. Late each afternoon you notice the slow, waddling sways of wandering RVs as they amble past the sign-in desk toward their evening encampments. You sense the weariness in their faces from the day’s drive but soon witness a transformation. It begins with an instinctive spark of purpose and then the robotic ritual of setting up camp unfolds. With precision timing each person performs their role and soon these fellow travelers are on track to their evening agenda. I’ve watched it again and again. It’s an entertaining Ballet in Bermudas as they grace the choreography of nomadic homesteading.

Couples new to RVing often find a steep learning curve. That was our experience. From the comforts of traveling in a car where your biggest concern is red lights on the dash, now, there’s a new appreciation for widths and lengths, and efficient storage of minimal stuff and maintaining necessary tank levels. The learning curve also holds the less tangible equations of RV ownership. One, in particular, is how rookie travelers develop one of the most basic skills: Communicating while Parking the Recreational Vehicle. This component of the RV experience is critical as it affects all other aspects of the joint venture.

Over time, various techniques are employed to develop a personal RV Parking Communication Style (RVPCS). Some incorporate the latest technologies – cell phones or walkie talkies, others are more robustly vocal and still other have perfected a modified semaphore signal system to put the rig to rest.

Watch for clearance!

Our learning curve began with the natural vocal style – just yelling out the window – but we soon found the shortfalls. I had to repeatedly leave the driver seat to see the facial expressions that often accompany spousal discourse. Non-verbal cues (e.g., the raised eyebrow and rolled eye) are essential to the marital communication experience. The parking process just grew longer than need be for what should be a reasonably easy task.

Our next attempt was to develop a series of hand signals but Sue struggled with the concept that I have to actually see those signals for any hope of success. She has to be in the vision of my rearview mirrors. I would go looking for her only to find her standing directly behind the motorhome making directing motions I had no way of seeing. Finally, at another camp, in one more trial attempt at communicating, we lined up the mirrors. This time Sue had signals – but they were HER signals. I’m looking in the mirror at a reverse image, straining to hear any verbal cues while I envisioned the non-verbal ones. And then, in the mirror’s reflection, I see this frantic, double-arm stirring gyration I later learn is meant for me to turn something in the direction opposite to the reverse image I’m seeing in the mirror. It’s literally Smoke and Mirrors as the RV tail pipe clouds our space. There was no success from this trial but we did manage to utilize her gestures to shoo away flying bugs from our evening meal.

One of the benefits of frequently setting up campsites is that the repetitiveness fine tunes systems and the tasks are completed with increased efficiency. Our systems and routines as to water, electric and accessories were streamlining just fine but the primary task of simply parking the RV was keeping us from the campfire.

Stay out of the water!

The breakthrough finally came late one night as I tried to nod off. Apparently, a vision of me backing off the side of a mountain campsite following her flailing, bug-killing arm motions focused my thoughts on the need to develop a better way to communicate directions.

I thought to myself, what was the most basic information I need to put the 25 foot motorhome in its designated space? First, I want to know: where I need to end up on the parking pad – left to right and how far back, and second: How are my clearances – overhead and either side? A singular question to guide the communications evolved. Simply (and, with apologies, now graphically stated): I need Sue to answer my question: Where do you want my butt to go? My butt meaning, by extension, the back of the RV. It worked the first time! It must have been OUR love language. She stood where I could see her in the mirrors and simply gestured left or right as to where the butt of the RV should go. More deliberate signaling to the left means a sharper turn to get there. Lighter arm movements to the left or right indicate to just tweak the trajectory. The simple solution paid big rewards and shortened our time to get to the evening meal by the campfire. (Note: No bugs were lost in the execution of these directions.)

We continue to fine tune the leveling tasks (no automatic lifts on our unit) but we’re seeing promise in the process. Each new location and set-up subconsciously adds familiarity to the routine with a few seconds shaved off here and an understanding of function gained there. The best part of having our own RV parking Love Language is that sets the tone for the evening and days ahead.

We wish you success in finding your parking communications. If you ever notice another couple watching you set up camp it could be us enjoying our evening’s entertainment as we observe another Ballet in Bermudas Along the Pooka Trail.


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